So we had this conversation over and over again....or I should say he has lectured me on the same topic over and over again. "All that Bible Study and blogging takes up too much of your time. You need to think about what your priority is as a full time mom and wife." he would say to me whenever I forgot to do the things he had told me to do.
The same thing happened again yesterday morning when he was waken up by Madison's alarm clock and got all flustered. Frustrated, he came downstairs, seeing me do my devotional reading, started scolding me on how I had been careless on Madison' sleep quality and her diet. "That's why Madison doesn't grow as much. She's not getting enough sleep. Also, look what you gave them for lunch yesterday. They can't just eat salad. They are kids and they are growing. They can't eat like us. You, as a mom, need to make sure that she gets enough sleep and eats properly. I don't care about your BSF and all that blogging....you need to do your job as a mom."
Really? Seriously, am I a single parent here? Every morning I wake up standing in the kitchen doing the stuff that I would never do in my life if I didn't have kids. For the past years they've been going to school, the only time he woke up early morning to make them lunch was when I was sick three weeks ago. Every week I go to more than 3 different supermakets to get the best quality of food that they require, acquiring a variety of fruits that they like and play balls with them whenever there is a need. Never a single time did I miss nor was late for picking them up or dropping them off for school or important events because I was "doing my own stuff".
I can't believe he is accusing me of slacking off my duty as a mother using the very thing that I deem the most in parenting...praying and reading God's word. He doesn't realize that parenting is totally a spiritual warefare. Without coming to God first, everything we do for the children is in vain.
I can never do parenting alone....not only can't I do it on my own strenght, or with his help, but we need the partnership from above who is the Father of all heavenly lights, who is the one that gives lives of our children and the one life who assures of their breathing and moving around.
Of course, he doesn't understand. He never picks up a Bible and reads.
Granted, food is important to ensure our physical growth. But our confidence and strength in parenting doesn't come from what we feed them fleshly but what we do for them spiritually.
I don't discount the fact that maybe I need to work on Madison's sleep hours. In fact, I already told her starting from today she was not to set her alarm clock and just sleep until whenever. But more importantly, how I want him to understand that role of parenting takes two. I'm not the only one responsibly here.
What I would have appreciated is a little more understanding and a better attitude.
And last but not the least, I need Jesus to help me become a parent.
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